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About Deviant Official Beta Tester Plain Brown Wrapper ManUnited States Recent Activity
Deviant for 8 Years
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Should SROP post a bunch of free samples somewhere on DA so prospective "readers" can check out bits of books more "easily"? 

4 deviants said Why not?
2 deviants said Yes.
1 deviant said Yes! Stack them behind the Andy Warhol quilt.
1 deviant said Vegan.
No deviants said Huh?
No deviants said What do you mean by "free"?
No deviants said No.
No deviants said Why?
No deviants said No! Let sleeping samples lie. Nobody wants them anyway.
No deviants said Other, please comment heartily.

Book Covers by DA Artists

My Stamp Collection

Oh, I feel so cheesy and youthful at the same time! Now I have a stamp collection...
I ROCK by erosarts Anti bots stamp by dango21192 Frank Zappa Stamp by Paulrus-Keaton I Support by vanilla-vanilla

Mature Content

Crustacean Stamp by vanilla-vanilla
Tibet by jonnymorris I Heart Burning Giraffes by vanilla-vanilla Fred Astaire Stamp by ElizaMoonchild The End of the World by vanilla-vanilla Stamp: Stop SOPA by TheRyanFord Let's All Say Vagina by vagina-vagina
The Rat of Approval Stamp by vanilla-vanilla Banned in Iran Stamp by vanilla-vanilla I Take Mr Wolfe Very Seriously Stamp by vanilla-vanilla I Like Like by vanilla-vanilla


And... It looks like America is down for the count.
"Happy" election day. I hope all y'all youngsters have either voted already or are on your way to the polls right now. This appalling trainwreck of an election could be the most important one of your lifetime...
At the tone the time will be 8:37 and ten seconds.


Plain Brown Wrapper Man
United States
Pay no attention to that plain brown wrapper man behind the colorful mask!

Uncle Vanilla's Quote of the Year: Art is {all the stuff you draw/make/write/sculpt/sing/weave while you're trying to become an Artist} minus all the bits involving feces.

Current Residence: Santa Banana, California, Earth
deviantWEAR sizing preference: Kind of small
Print preference: Enormous
Favourite genre of music: Classical, Carnatic, Gamelan, Jazz
Favourite photographer: Pansy Schneider-Horst
Favourite style of art: Fantasy, Impressionism, Surrealism
Operating System: Yes. All systems operational...
MP3 player of choice: Creative Zen
Shell of choice: Chanel #5... oh wait I thought you said smell. Make that "Conch"...
Wallpaper of choice: Red and fuzzy
Skin of choice: Green
Favourite cartoon character: Either Snoopy or Phineas Freak
Personal Quote: She did her best painting on the side of a bomb. Unfortunately, someone dropped it.
It's no secret around here on DA that I have a few opinions. Sometimes I post them for people to mull over.

Now, everyone's grandma has probably said, at one time or another: "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

So I put on my thinking cap and decided to do that. After all, even loathsome pussy-grabbing troglodytes must have some redeeming characteristics, right? I mean, at least one, right? Hmmm.

The nicest thing I can say right now about president elect Trump is that he'll certainly be more undignified than his predecessor.

At least the new first lady will be an unrepentant plagiarist.

And Trump definitely has poofy hair. And he has hands, too, even if they're microsopic.

And at least we can be sure Trump will keep his wiggly fingers in every pie.

And Trump's election should be a true inspiration to young people everywhere. He has proven conclusively that ABSOLUTELY ANYONE — no matter how unqualified, illiterate, misogynistic, bigoted, bankrupt, or loathsome they are — can become President of the USA. Isn't that reassuring for little girls to know?

Last night I happily dreamed that a team of surgeons had Trump on the operating table for an emergency brain transplant before he takes office next January. When they opened his head some coprolites fell out. And then the only brain they had available in the fridge was from a micro-cephalic pig. When the O.R. nurse brought the pig brain on a paper plate, the head surgeon suggested that putting it into a Trump body would be insulting to pigs everywhere. After some discussion, the team decided that leaving the brain case empty was the best bet. "Nobody will ever notice," said the lead surgeon.

So that's something nice, too: Trump is just as good without a brain. Kind of like the Scarecrow from Wizard of Oz... Except... Oh, darn, Trump doesn't have a heart, either does he? So is he the Tin Man or the Scarecrow? I'm sure the US media will kick around that important question for four years or so.

This is one of those times I wish I had actual drawing skills. I would make a really fun party game called Pin the Poop on the Rump of Trump. It would be a full-color large size cardboard and you could tape it to your living-room wall. It would have several packets of RealPoop™. They'd be ultra stinky, and you could buy bags of replacement poop when you run out. And the game would come in two versions. The simple version for children would have a Trump with a gigantic pimple-covered rump that would be easy for kids to find, and it would give off putrid gas occasionally, for realistic flair. The adult version would come with a gigantic bloated head (and real hair) so nobody would have to bother finding the hind-end, they could go straight for where it counts.
  • Listening to: Barfing Heads
  • Watching: Death Throes of a Nation
  • Playing: Pin the You-Know-What Where
  • Eating: Nothing
  • Drinking: Coffee (today only, I swear)


Add a Comment:
rachelillustrates Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2015  Professional Traditional Artist
Thank you for the points, good sir :)
(1 Reply)
sarah-labidi Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2015  Hobbyist Photographer
thanks for the faves :)
TeaKitsune Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2015  Professional Traditional Artist
Thank you for the watch :)
(1 Reply)
librarian-of-hell Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Bambi´s ˝barrel˝. Heh heh. :) (yeah, my 2A envy brain went there. :meow: )
(1 Reply)
Shannonandklara Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2014
merry christmas XD
(1 Reply)
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